The Personal Approach to the Personal Statement
The latest news, tips, & tricks for surviving the college admissions game
At this point in your academic career, you’ve heard of the creative writing mantra — show, don’t tell. You want the admissions officers to live out the story as you did by engaging them in every nitty-gritty detail. But what does that actually mean and how do you do that? I broke down the technique in five easy-to-follow suggestions from admissions essays that worked.
Read More1) Start a Journal
The hardest thing about a personal essay is finding your voice—most high schools focus on the academic essay, which is more stiff and formulaic than the admissions essay. An easy way to discover what you sound like when you're not citing academic sources or analyzing text is to start a journal. Every night before bed, take a few minutes to write about your day or what's worrying you or even try some of the prompts in the Common App. The relaxing background should let you tap into your personal voice without the pressure of sounding academic. At the very least, you'll have some snippets saved away for the draft writing stage.
TOPIC 1: Redefining The Idea of Masculinity While Growing Up With Two Moms
SUCCESS RATE: Accepted to all 10 schools he applied to, including Cornell University, Dartmouth College, Yale University, Princeton University, and the Massachusetts Institute of Technology.
WHY IT WORKED: Colleges want to see exceptional students who overcome adversity because it shows strength and students are not afraid to challenge societal norms, because that takes risk. This essay manages to convey both at once.
Read MoreI’ve noticed an alarming trend among my students.
The one-giant-block-of-text essay. The no-paragraph-breaks essay. The good-god-my-eyes-are-going-to-bleed-if-I-read-this essay.
My big piece of advice is not only to separate your essay into multiple, distinct paragraphs, but also to separate each paragraph with smooth transitions and topic sentences that help the reader follow along with your narrative. Better yet, aim for short and sweet paragraphs for easy reading. Remember that admissions officers are going through 100s of these essays a day — don’t make it harder for them to concentrate with one dizzying block of text that’s difficult to read.
Read MoreOver the years, I’ve read and edited hundreds of college application essays. To help you during your writing stage, I’ve recapped my most useful edits below so you can avoid the common mistakes that pop up most often in college admissions essays.
1) Using Bloated Thesaurus Speak
Most students think a higher vocabulary (read: thesaurus) will make their essay sound better. That instinct may work for your more formal academic essays, but it’s wrong in the case of the personal statement: the essay should sound how you speak, not a formal academic letter. "Thenceforward" and “heretofore,” for example, seem way too formal and almost sound funny in this personal context. Would you ever use those words in real life? Didn’t think so.
Read MoreLike writer’s block, procrastination is another anxiety behavior that gets in the way of creative writing, especially if what you’re working on what feels like the most important piece of writing that will determine your entire future. No pressure. Try not to break a sweat reading that Common App prompt.
But, just like writers block, the best way to beat procrastination is to get out of your head. (Easier said than done, of course). Here are a few things that have worked with me:
Often when you’re procrastinating on something you don’t want to do, you end up doing other things in an effort to be productive: cleaning, organizing, other homework, etc. Procrastination is a negative cycle, and it gets worse the longer you procrastinate. You don’t want to start the essay and the longer you put it off, the more you feel like a failure. and the worse you feel, and the more you end up putting off. Or you’re just feeling really down about yourself and— see what I’m talking about? Not productive or helpful for anyone.
So take a deep breath and start writing down everything else you got done that day, including basic things you take for granted like feeding yourself breakfast and responding to emails. Before you know it, you’ll realize you got way more done than you thought, which will empower you with the momentum you need to get started.
A simple “done list” is all you need to put yourself on the right track to getting this personal statement done once and for all!
Usually whatever you don’t want to start is stemming from a negative feeling: maybe you’re anxious about it because it feels too hard, or it’s just boring and you don’t want to spend time on it. The best way of curbing that feeling is to picture how relieved you’ll be when it’s over - really bring this visualization to life. Picture how relaxed you’ll feel down to your toes— picture closing the tab on your computer that’s been open for weeks, picture bingeing on Netflix, or whatever it is you will do to celebrate.
Let this picture-perfect vision guide you to opening up that Word doc.
Sometimes, I just need to trick myself to sit and not move in order to write and the best way for me to do that is to literally paint my nails so all I could do is type while they dry. Otherwise, I would be cleaning or finding other random things to do around the house. It’s that simple.
Before writing about your non-profit for your personal statement, read these red flags that can pop up to admissions officers. Your personal statement is supposed to tell a story of genuine growth. Be honest with yourself: how invested are you in your non-profit? If it doesn’t capture everything you’re about, consider saving it for a supplement.
Read MoreIn fact, just because it’s a shorter supplement doesn’t mean you should leave it for last. The “Why this college?” supplement is actually one of the hardest essays to answer. Ideally, you would’ve visited the campus, researched the school, and spoken to former alums to really know the answer. But not everyone has the privilege (or money) to travel to see schools — especially in the middle of a global pandemic. Luckily, I have some shortcuts for you.
Read MoreSo, you’ve been revising until your eyes gloss over? Words are all starting to look the same and you’re reciting your admissions essay in your sleep? Professional authors spend a long time figuring out just what proofreading process works for them. Here’s the trick for the last step of this writing process: start off with plenty of material (don’t worry about word count until that whole story is there on the page) and then get ready to polish it using the following tips.
Read More
For anyone starting the essay process, reading the 7 prompts of the Common App essay brings about dread, indecision, and maybe even nausea.
Before you freak out, remember that admissions officers don’t care which prompt you pick. That’s right - there’s no secret “hardest” prompt that gets you the most points if you answer it.
During this daunting essay writing process, students fixate on the wrong things. They start by obsessing over the question prompts instead of thinking more strategically about what they want admissions officers to know about them.
I always advise my students to start the essay writing process by ignoring the prompts altogether for that reason. Otherwise, they end up stuck with a forced essay that may not reveal the most important parts of their story. I recommend you first try journaling about yourself to get at the heart of what you want people to know about you. (Here are some journaling questions to get started.)
I also always recommend choosing the last open-ended prompt if you’re stuck.
Share an essay on any topic of your choice. It can be one you've already written, one that responds to a different prompt, or one of your own design.
This blank canvas of a question allows you to think first about what story you want to tell — what makes you who you are? — rather than some random narrative that answers a random question. I also find many of the “lessons learned” prompts to end up being too generic.
The additional information section of the common app is an extra opportunity to help stand out to the college admissions officers. This section is great for explaining any discrepancies between your grades & disciplinary behavior that don’t align with your character but still might be on your record, and that hasn’t been mentioned elsewhere in your application. Even if you feel like you have nothing else to say, do not submit your application without utilizing this extra space.
Read MoreMy general answer to this is no for multiple reasons. First, the essay should reflect who you are separate from this short period of time in your life (unless it greatly impacted your life in an indelible way). We should get a snapshot of your personality and character separate from the past 6 months. Second, there is a risk of trend saturation as many students will feel tempted to write about this.
Of course, there are exceptions to every rule. To find out if you should write about Coronavirus in your personal essay, see how you’d answer the questions below.
Read MoreAha, you’ve written your first draft. Congratulations! This is the hard part. Now, give it a breather and put it away for a few days at least so your words will seem fresh for the revision process.
First, look for repetitions.
Are you using the same word over and over? (Everyone has their own personal crutch). If you're a vocab savant, check for other repetitions like, are your sentences all periodic and using the same construction? Like life, good writing needs variety.
Read MoreThe “Why this college?” supplement is actually one of the hardest essays to answer.
If you’ve already tried my 5 “why this college” essay tips and are still feeling stuck, here are a few journaling and research questions I give my students to discover the deeper reasons for wanting to attend each school without descending into generic cliches.
1) Go back to your opening anecdote
If you used the creative writing technique of an opening anecdote, one fun way to close your essay can be returning to that same story in your concluding paragraph. For example, if your opening narrative was about the first economics class you took and how it was love at first equation, you can try describing the thrill of the class in the same creative ways that you did the opening. Try writing vivid examples and really get us to feel like we are in your place. What was it like on the first day of class? What did it feel like doing your homework? Interacting with other Econ students? Was it like an aha moment where you finally felt something click, like this is what I was meant to do? Try revisiting that opening anecdote with a new perspective at the end.
What makes a great (admissions) essay?
Something totally real and unpretentious. Admissions officers want to get know the real you apart from a dizzying algorithm of numbers, extracurricular hours, and GPAs. Give them a slice of life that reveals who you are instead of something fake that you think sounds good. I wrote about cooking with my grandma—so simple it's almost cliche. But I used that anecdote to explore my immigrant identity and show what I’ve overcome.
Read MoreAndrew’s editing process happened after he finished writing for a reason. Editing for word count should come in the final stages when you feel like you’ve told your whole story. Take as many words as you need to tell your truth. Then, refine and edit with each draft. (Yes, plan on writing multiple drafts and revisions - that’s how good writing happens!). By your fourth draft, you can start to think about editing for word count.
Read MoreThis memoir is a beautiful account of surviving an extreme Mormon survivalist sect so against the “government” that she grew up without a birth certificate. Westover details being forced to do dangerous hard labor as a kid and being abused by an older brother whose mental health issues are ignored and denied. The story is ultimately inspiring: She went on to graduate from Cambridge with a history PhD.
Good for: Writing about a complicated family upbringing
Get inspired by: Great examples of deep self-reflection and answering the “why.” Westover has had years to process what happened to her (hopefully with therapy), so she is able to describe her past in a way that is deep but not accusatory. When writing about abuse, the tone is really important in showing how you overcame the adversity, and Westover’s descriptions are a good example of showing hurt without sounding bitter, which is a hard balance to strike when writing about something so personal.
2) Start exploring your passions
Freshman year is all about figuring out what you love to do. Ideally, you'd spend the next four years honing that passion, developing your talents, and growing into a leadership position that you can write about for a supplemental college essay. Use your freshman year to explore all of your interests so that by junior year, you're signing up for less clubs and really building your leadership in those. Don't wait until later in high school to figure out what you love: admissions officers want to see commitment and leadership in a few clubs, not just a list of extracurriculars you're somewhat involved in.
Read MoreUse Old-School Pen & Paper
I recommend the old-school writing technique of journaling: pen and paper, when you are relaxed (like before going to bed). At this point, you need to write more than you think and this is a great way of silencing your inner critic. Journaling also has proven therapeutic benefits, so it will help you write your way through whatever you’re going through.
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